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The Darling Blog Of May

Darling Day 21. Forever

Darling is the day

that lasts forever.

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The Darling Blog Of May

Darling Day 20. This Night

Under dim lights of orange,

whisper to me

darling,

of the places your soft touch

will sail me to

this night.

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The Darling Blog Of May

Darling Day 19. Darling of my Soul

Darling of my soul.

Darling of my soul.

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The Darling Blog Of May

Darling Day 18. The Little Boy

Darling is the little boy that cannot sleep.

‘I think I need a bandaid, Mum. Mum? I think I need a bandaid.’

They start their tricks young, these beautiful tiny humans, don’t they.

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The Darling Blog Of May

Darling Day 17. Surrender

Darling are the lonely ones.

The sad ones.

The tired ones.

The human ones.

Darling is the moment

of sweet surrender,

when the cave

of hard fought bravery

crashes into the sea of

what actually is.

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The Darling Blog Of May

Darling Day 16. Fifteen Minutes Late

I’ve had wine.

And I’ve had my Dad and my sister for the first time since the government has allowed me to have them…for months.

So I’m fifteen minutes late for the darling day, which technically means I’ve missed it. (Meep. 😛 )

But I assure you, darling day sixteen was lovely, however delayed.

There was a walk with nature, where I listened to all the dreamy love songs and dreamed all the dreamy dreams.

There was a burst of ten dogs by the lake: a gang of large German Sheppards / golden retrievers on their first get together since ‘lockdown’ restriction eased.

And then there was love.

My Dad and my sister—my two brothers will be next.

Really.

It was a darling, darling day.

I love my ‘unconditional’ people.

More than life, I truly love my unconditional people.

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The Darling Blog Of May

Darling Day 15. Golden Fields

This heart whispers

to the fragile night of the soul.

The darling buds,

once closed,

now reach with

delicate fingers

to the soft of a brand new

sun.

Light the way, dear sun.

Release the petals

still stuck in place.

Let the night be but a pleasant

sigh across the golden fields

of evermore.

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The Darling Blog Of May

Darling Day 14. Liberation

Crisp walls and lavender fresh linen. It was her mother who insisted on such drastic perfection and, until now, it had never occurred to Geraldine that life had the option to be anything other than perfect. She would be forty in a month, and although her Mother would not approve, Geraldine craved something more. Something wild. Something actually really quite bad.

She flung a leg out of the bath and breathed into her belly: hold one, two three…a cool, soothing wind on the out-breath. What if she did allow herself a regression to the grotty child that once she was? An ignorant small human, who far too often muddied the guest couch—and her mother’s delightfully manicured day. A child who, one day, would find the courage to tell her mother that the couch had been, in fact, the hills coming alive with the romping, stomping wonderful sound of music.

Darling,‘ her mother would say, through a smiling mouth and chainsaw eyes. ‘You must always be good.‘ Eventually, the words and the eyes had the desired effect, and Geraldine did, indeed, grow into the neatly folded girl her Mother had groomed her to be. Perfection in a girl, life under strict lock and key. Geraldine was the fly in the web of her mother’s high standards. Alive but not living. Rotting away under the critical eye of the long-legged other in her life.

Her bathrobe waited to give her a warm hug after the bath was over. What if she didn’t use it? What if she stood, dried, and walked about the house. Naked. She lived alone, but even so, free range nudity was a luxury afforded only to men, and those unfortunate women requiring external stimulation for the treatment of low self-esteem. Nudity— even solo nudity—was not for good girls.

Until, of course, it was.

Geraldine rose from the tub and reached for the gracefully folded towel that lay atop the sparkling white sink. Perfection died tonight. Her mother’s hold on her life died, all limbs bared, tonight.

The soft leather couch was like warm paint to her naked skin. Although the liberation of nudity felt wonderful, it was…still not enough. Geraldine needed more. And so it was, that more arose.

As if by some miraculous order of the universe, some equally trapped eternal wind searching for life, the doorbell rang.

Geraldine smiled.

She rose from the couch, without a beat, without a care.

Darling, indeed, she thought.

Darling, indeed.

 

 

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The Darling Blog Of May

Darling Day 13. The Wind of Everything

Every darling day,

I wait

to breathe.

Just one breath.

A chance

to be,

to dream,

to love.

And when that

gust of life becomes me

I am grateful.

To the darling wind

of everything…

I am grateful.

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The Darling Blog Of May

Darling Day 12. Darling Days

The echo of two hearts

drifting down the hall,

and all the darling days

we skipped arm in arm,

like children;

no more.

All the beauty of our yesterday,

I remember you.

Fondly,

I remember the darling days,

and I smile

as I crack down the middle

again.

Another fork in the road.

Another road of destiny

to travel.

Without you.

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