I have spent so much time
searching for the next step,
and yet
the next step
has always been taken.
With no need to search.
Categories
Tag: Spiritual journey
Categories
Loveliness
Ah, the loveliness.
There it is again.
As smooth as the drifting river,
as quiet as the song of a mother
to the sky.
Lovely loveliness.
The sweetest of all the dreams.
Categories
A Little More Than This
I do not care to be seen.
I do not wish to scramble,
do not wish to fight my way
to the top
to be seen,
to be loved
a little more than this.
Perhaps I should try harder
to care.
Perhaps I should wish
that I might choose,
one day,
to fight like them
until I have been
chosen
and loved.
A little more than this.
Categories
How Lovely
How lovely.
The wind of peace.
Here.
Now.
My
how lovely.
The concept of listening to music.
Curious.
Close your eyes.
Where is the music?
Are you listening?
Or is the music
in
you?
Categories
An Open Heart
You might think the glow of an open heart to be impossible outside the honeymoon phase of romantic love, but I assure you: it’s quite possible. And it is very, very lovely, my goodness.
When I relax into the warmth in my chest, I feel the most beautiful sense of softness and love radiate through me. Especially when I’m listening to music. It’s as though a night light has been switched on in the dark of me, and there I am, ready to hold it out to the world in search of someone to share its glow with.
A physical feeling of heat and light, is the best way I can describe my version of an open heart, and there are not many natural feelings like it at all (apart from the primal urges of childbirth, perhaps, which…actually, I should write a post on that, sometime. Childbirth is often painted for its painful side, but overlooked for the absolute primal miracle it is.)
I’m so terribly unfinished in terms of my emotional healing from the past, but there are some beautiful things going on in my life in the now that I’m grateful for. For the first time in my life I’m happily rising early to do yoga. Every morning. I’ve done it for a week, and I know I won’t stop because I’ve decided it, firmly. It feels far too beautiful to wake my body up in such an earthy way, and it’s linked with the very best part—I’m no longer rushing around and frantic when it comes time to whistle the kids out the door. In itself, that is a small step in the right direction.
It definitely helps that I’ve found the most beautiful, gentle yoga teacher on YouTube. Every time he whispers ‘relax, it’s alright, it’s all good’, it’s like it activates something within my core that knows he is one hundred percent right. That, no matter what, it’s alright, it’s all good.
Anyhow, I just wanted to check in with my real voice and let you all know I’m still here and that, no, I’ve not got a poetry writing robot posting here on my behalf. Although, truly: I’ll be if I know where some of my writing comes from. I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again: some of the words I write really do not feel like my doing, at all. It’s all very magical and lovely and strange.
I’m happy with magical and lovely and strange, if you are. xx
Here I am, now.
Me.
And I fly and I fly
and I fly away, now.
Still me.
Flying, flying away.
They tell me not to fly away.
They tell me not to fly away.
Living carefully and beautifully,
I know I am home.
There is no feeling
quite like the delicious wholeness
of a lost girl
found once more.
There is no feeling quite like this.
I feel the way I feel
because I feel the way I feel.
Because I am soft
and gentle,
because I am wild as the rain
and free as the sky.
But I am not free,
not really,
not in this world.
And that is surely
a tragic day
for the aspect of me
who knows she is unlimited.
