There it was, quietly mine.
A moment of the greatest love: a Mother’s love.
My love.
For them.
And I know they tire me senseless,
and I know I wish them away
(too often for my heart to understand)
but they are the precious hands
I long to hold
a lifetime.
Those two small ones.
I choose their little arms, forever.
What is love, you might wish to know.
Love,
quite frankly,
is you.
I’m sitting at a table with one kid beside me, and another kid beside the kid beside me. My kids. Precious and two (although given they are six and three years old— it sometimes feels as though there are ten of them. Bless.) 🙂
We’ve just watched the most beautiful, beautiful show thanks to the wonderful program my little boy’s school is remotely running for school. It’s a fish thing. A deep blue sea thing, to be exact, and this week we are learning all about the beauty and majesty of the deep blue sea. I say we are learning because it seems there is quite a lot I don’t know about the ocean. For example, I’ve only just learned that, not only is coral alive, it also gives birth to real-life coral babies! Mind blown.
It just goes to show how sound asleep I’ve been for the majority of my life, sticking to the lanes I already know. The beautiful news is: there is a brighter shine to my perspective now that I’ve opened my eyes. The world seems magical and alive, again, more than ever before.
There is a small problem. There are so many wondrous, exciting, beautiful pathways to explore, and yet there is the lingering truth that finding time (and energy) to explore them remains a challenge. I’m part parent, part human with desires of my own. I’m not sure I’ll ever find the balance it takes to successfully master both at the same time, but I’ll never stop trying.
Let the life within me swell from the excitement of possibility, and let these sweet babes of mine feed off the shine in their hopeful Mum’s eye.
Life is beautiful, and mine I will use to explore as I will.
Home is in this house.
The quiet of my love for them.
The dreams of my essence, racing into a fresh new world.
Home, you are my refuge.
Family, you are my home.
Never forget, little Sun.
You are so loved.
Tonight
I tear again.
The ache of a mother
remembering her ducklings, sweet.
It’s a long, long road to the deep end of a soul.
And some days ripple and crash
more than other days do.
The rain falls inside.
Tonight.
Darling is the little boy that cannot sleep.
‘I think I need a bandaid, Mum. Mum? I think I need a bandaid.’
They start their tricks young, these beautiful tiny humans, don’t they.
I’ve had wine.
And I’ve had my Dad and my sister for the first time since the government has allowed me to have them…for months.
So I’m fifteen minutes late for the darling day, which technically means I’ve missed it. (Meep. 😛 )
But I assure you, darling day sixteen was lovely, however delayed.
There was a walk with nature, where I listened to all the dreamy love songs and dreamed all the dreamy dreams.
There was a burst of ten dogs by the lake: a gang of large German Sheppards / golden retrievers on their first get together since ‘lockdown’ restriction eased.
And then there was love.
My Dad and my sister—my two brothers will be next.
Really.
It was a darling, darling day.
I love my ‘unconditional’ people.
More than life, I truly love my unconditional people.
Dearest darling bunny ones
my hop-a-long divine,
this Mother’s heart will always beat
to find your hands in mine.
One life I share with you my dears,
one chance I have to say:
I’ll do my very best to be
my best in every way.
If not for me, then for you both,
I’ll fly into my shine,
and hope the twinkle raises you,
beyond each wish of mine.
So, happy day, my darlings two,
you’ve made my heart fly free,
and to your sleepy dreams, I’ll send
a loving kiss from me.
***
Happy Mother’s Day, my lovely bloggy friends.
To the Mothers. To the Daughters.
To the women who mother themselves SO beautifully, and share the way with the rest of us.
Thank you.
You are always enough. Even when you doubt your worth, you are ALWAYS just a step away from finding it again. Trust. The wind will take you there, I’m so sure.
xx
So much love,
Brooke.
(Yeah, yeah. All the mushy love hearts, you know what I’m like 😛 Whatevs. 😛 )
She wobbled along, the little darling on wheels.
Two wheels (which seemed to be the problem.)
Mum balanced her own bike between her legs, guiding her duckling as best she could, until at last:
there was flight.
As I strolled along behind the two,
occasionally glancing into the shedding trees,
the Mum within me hoped.
Please let the little duckling balance.
Please let the little duckling fly.
After a while, the two disappeared and I forgot the darling struggle.
Forgot the invisible cord that attached my empathy to the shake, wobble, roll.
Once again, I was lost.
Within the bliss-filled world of me,
I was lost.
Until I was no longer lost,
but right back where I began.
Face to face
with one
precious
fallen
duckling.
Everything within me wished to reach for her.
To hold her for a while.
To look into her eyes, and have her understand
that without the fall…
the true beauty of flight
would never be known to her.
Darling was the little duckling
that stole my heart on this darling day of May.
Darling was how hard she tried.
And darling was the invisible cord of life
that connected us.
