Which Aspect Of ‘Now’ Are We Talking About?

I’ve become an expert in solving problems that may or may not occur. It’s both a wonderful and a terrible thing, depending on the perspective you take. Problems do not exist, for instance, until the moment they occur and are perceived, and yet in my world they both exist and are solved in an invisible home of my own mental creation…before they’ve even happened.

Often times, they never do happen.

And yet, because I have perceived them, and mentally lived their many aspects and outcomes, they are as real as the real, real thing.

No wonder my nervous system is a little frazzled.

Apparently this sort of hyper vigilance is a result of early life trauma, and although I had an absolutely beautiful childhood, and was extremely loved and well cared for…I was, for whatever reason, highly sensitive. My teen years were dotted with trauma. My early adult years were flooded with emotion, confusion and anxiety. And all the while, every little eye brow raise came to mean something frightening to me, and so you can imagine the aches felt when I truly was being attacked by life.

Enter problem solving territory. I learnt to recognise and run from the beast before he’d even thought to attack, which I gather is quite a common thing among human folk, actually. Probably more common than most choose to admit.

Obviously, this sort hyper-vigilance has caused quite a few issues in my life, and relationships, so I’m learning to become aware and catch myself in moments where I am constructing a damaging story for myself to pre-live. And yet, I’d also say that having the ability to pre-think situations has added to my spiritual tool kit.

It’s allowed me the extra space needed to find the beauty in even the most disastrous of situations.

It’s acted as a rehearsal period for the painful moments of life, and I’m grateful for this, despite psychologists and spiritual kings out there declaring ‘now’ is best.

Of course now is best.

Now is the only truth.

And yet, while we are human…now is just another dimension of the everything reality is made of.

We will never understand the fullness of the universe.

But we can live bits and pieces of it, and pick up its interesting, thoughtful breadcrumbs along the way.

Photo by Nacho Juu00e1rez on

8 replies on “Which Aspect Of ‘Now’ Are We Talking About?”

Oh my goodness, I’d love to think that I do have it figured out, but life is still such a wondrously frustrating mystery to me! 🥰 I’ve just always been a very deep thinker, and my greatest joy is experiencing and analysing the many interesting facets of life. And then spilling them into my blog at some point on the journey. ☺️x

Liked by 2 people

Oh, goodness, Brooke, I do the same thing! It drives my husband batty, but it’s so soothing to me, and a part of me believes another version of me is living through those situations I conjure. I love how the now isn’t nearly as scary as I sometimes imagine it will be, but it just makes the fabric around it that much richer.

Liked by 2 people

I LOVE the idea of there being many versions of us. 🙂 Ypu’d love the show ‘The OA’, Kat. It’s on netflix over here but there are only two seasons and then they stopped making it. Still, it’s so cool. Very multidimensional…and my other favourite: romantic! ha ha ha. xx

Liked by 1 person

If we ever get Netflix, I’ll check it out! Multidimensional stories can get so confusing, but they’re so much fun and I love all the ideas they spin out. All the possibilities are just incredible to think of!

Liked by 1 person

I’m so glad my words are resonating with you. ☺️ And yes, when others don’t understand our perspective there is a tendency for driving the other slightly nuts. ☺️ Such is the glorious, chaotic carnival that is humanity. All the best to you and Bob! xx

Liked by 1 person

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s